How does a person help an alcoholic who wants to stop drinking, but surrounds himself with the wrong people and feels compelled to spend time with his “family” at the bar?? Is it possible for him to stop?
I think an Alcoholic can only stop drinking once THEY chooze to do so, all the people in the world really can’t help you, especially if you don’t let them.
What will help iss having a group of people to support them, also they will only stop if THEY theemselves want to stop. Nobody can make you do/don’t do something.
No one can make someone else stop drinking. They have to want to..and be willing to do whatever it takes to achieve that…that includes changing people,places and things that are associated with the drinking lifestyle!!!!
it is possible but not without the help of either professionls or him taking the first step by going to AA. maybe you could try coaxing him to go and you could accompany him so he doesn’t feel alone. contact your local AA or check out their web site for more information . its an addiction and they have to want help in order for them to accept help. good luck !
Until the person accepts that they have a drinking problem, you can do nothing for them except enable them if you are finding excuses for their behavior, or covering up things they have done. Anyone can stop drinking if they desire to, but generally they need help. Until they distance themselves from friends who drink and the places they frequent, chances are they will not stop drinking. You however can help yourself by joining a support group like Alanon or leaving the relationship.
No one except the person in question can help. If he wanted to stop drinking he would keep himself out of those situations. The only thing I can think of is try non alcohol related activities. Join a gym, go 3-4 days a week, but at like 8:00 at night. by the time your done workng out, he’ll be too tired to go out. Try going to a movie once a week at 10:00 at night. by the time the movie is done it will be late. Just try to come up with ideas of things to do that don’t involve alcohol and don’t have alcohol at them. Try to get his family and friends involved in these activities. Tell his family to have a family game night, play board games all night. etc.
Real alcoholics are real alcoholics because they cannot stop even though they want to. But be careful, just because a person tells another he “wants to stop” doesn’t mean it’s true.
But assuming he DOES want to stop – and cannot – then consider this line out of the book, “Alcoholics Anonymous”,
“At a certain point in the drinking of every alcoholic, he passes into a state where the most powerful desire to stop drinking is of absolutely no avail. This tragic situation has already arrived in practically every case long before it is suspected.” (24:0)
A very revealing statement to say the least. Many times we hear stuff like, “He has to WANT it” (meaning sobriety) but here are the folks with the most experience with alcoholism and the solution, admitting that this is impossible to do for the alcoholic.
As a real alcoholic myself I can tell from experience that alcoholics don’t drink because they WANT TO – they drink because the HAVE TO.
Even if he were to separate himself from his drinking friends and environments – he WILL STILL DRINK – no matter what!
So the solution is not to separate oneself from alcohol – but to recover from alcoholism so that he is FREE from King Alcohol and can place himself in the slipperiest of places and still not be tempted.
It is possible IF the solution is sought. If you’d like to know what they solution is, just ask, but hopefully that answers your immediate question directly.
slap her everytime she drinks or something jsut make her stop
I think an Alcoholic can only stop drinking once THEY chooze to do so, all the people in the world really can’t help you, especially if you don’t let them.
What will help iss having a group of people to support them, also they will only stop if THEY theemselves want to stop. Nobody can make you do/don’t do something.
No one can make someone else stop drinking. They have to want to..and be willing to do whatever it takes to achieve that…that includes changing people,places and things that are associated with the drinking lifestyle!!!!
it is possible but not without the help of either professionls or him taking the first step by going to AA. maybe you could try coaxing him to go and you could accompany him so he doesn’t feel alone. contact your local AA or check out their web site for more information . its an addiction and they have to want help in order for them to accept help. good luck !
Until the person accepts that they have a drinking problem, you can do nothing for them except enable them if you are finding excuses for their behavior, or covering up things they have done. Anyone can stop drinking if they desire to, but generally they need help. Until they distance themselves from friends who drink and the places they frequent, chances are they will not stop drinking. You however can help yourself by joining a support group like Alanon or leaving the relationship.
No one except the person in question can help. If he wanted to stop drinking he would keep himself out of those situations. The only thing I can think of is try non alcohol related activities. Join a gym, go 3-4 days a week, but at like 8:00 at night. by the time your done workng out, he’ll be too tired to go out. Try going to a movie once a week at 10:00 at night. by the time the movie is done it will be late. Just try to come up with ideas of things to do that don’t involve alcohol and don’t have alcohol at them. Try to get his family and friends involved in these activities. Tell his family to have a family game night, play board games all night. etc.
Real alcoholics are real alcoholics because they cannot stop even though they want to. But be careful, just because a person tells another he “wants to stop” doesn’t mean it’s true.
But assuming he DOES want to stop – and cannot – then consider this line out of the book, “Alcoholics Anonymous”,
“At a certain point in the drinking of every alcoholic, he passes into a state where the most powerful desire to stop drinking is of absolutely no avail. This tragic situation has already arrived in practically every case long before it is suspected.” (24:0)
A very revealing statement to say the least. Many times we hear stuff like, “He has to WANT it” (meaning sobriety) but here are the folks with the most experience with alcoholism and the solution, admitting that this is impossible to do for the alcoholic.
As a real alcoholic myself I can tell from experience that alcoholics don’t drink because they WANT TO – they drink because the HAVE TO.
Even if he were to separate himself from his drinking friends and environments – he WILL STILL DRINK – no matter what!
So the solution is not to separate oneself from alcohol – but to recover from alcoholism so that he is FREE from King Alcohol and can place himself in the slipperiest of places and still not be tempted.
It is possible IF the solution is sought. If you’d like to know what they solution is, just ask, but hopefully that answers your immediate question directly.
Peace,
Danny S
http://recoveredalcoholic.blogspot.com