Question by Debbie V: my husband of 9 years has a addiction to porn and has finally decide to go for counseling ?
would you feel comfortable with him seeing a woman counselor?
would you prefer your husband to see a woman counselor or a man counselor?
his problem has cost us a lot
him loosing his job for veiwing porn on-line, my car got repo because he spent my car payment on porn, he ran up the phone bill almost 1,500 using the computer to veiw porn.
Best answer:
Answer by Mary K
She might offer to take care of him on the side…counseling for porn seems a little extreme to me…lol
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i think a lorena bobbit is in order!!!
well if shes still a counselor by now than she’s prolly doing a good job at fixing peoples addiction
sounds like you cant trust him at all. if it were my husband i wouldnt care if it was a girl or guy
I don’t think it would bother me if my hubby went to a male or female counselor as long as he was going. That really is great that he has decided to go for counseling go, a good step in the right direction. I think you should just encourage him, no matter which sex his counselor is.
Personally as a man I feel comfortable with a woman, but whatever makes him comfortable.. Remember he is trying to improve, don’t restrict how he does that or it’s not going to work. Be supportive either way, I think it’s best to find a counselor that suits him rather than concentrate on their sex.
I don’t think it’s a matter of what me, as a wife, would feel comforatable with, I would think which gender would be most beneficial to his healing. A man knows how another man feels in these situations and would better understand why your husband is turning to this particular outlet.
It really would seem like another man that understands a man’s normal desires would be a better candidate. I think that most counselors are professionals so it may be fine that it’s a girl.
He must have a bad addiction if he has to go to counseling. I really don’t know a man that doesn’t watch some porn. My ex husband was really addicted and it was overkill but not all men are like this.
I would be comfortable with a women counselor as long as she was very professional. I figure he would feel more comfortable talking to a man.
Just go to a few meetings…meet her and then decide.
No, he should go to a man because men tend to listen to other men, more than they do us women!!
Man – may feel more comfortable for him and he may open up a bit more if he thinks he’s talking to a bloke that does it too.
Woman – he may feel that she is going to judge him and may be defensive from the start.
Its really not about what u prefer – if u want this to work let him choose.
doesnt really matter… if he was addicted to cheating or sex then i guess you could be worried about him doing the counselor but a porn addiction shouldnt affect who helps him. Hope this helps
I really don’t give a sh*t if my guy wants to watch porn. We have a great relationship, he NEVER feels like he has to lie to me. We have a great relationship with a strong trust relationship. Why are you being such a strong arm? Why can’t he watch porn alone? Are you really that jealous?
Be happy he is getting help. Try not to control everything. Give people some credit.
I think that ANY counselor, male or female, is a move in the right direction. Therapists are trained professionals, whether they are a man or a woman, and neither would be likely to become emotionally or sexually involved with your husband because it would put their career in jeopardy. You have more to worry about from the people your husband has been interacting with online, trust me.
I’ve been in your shoes, but my husband refused to acknowledge that he had a problem and our marriage ended in divorce. If your husband is willing to seek help, then don’t put restrictions on what type of therapist he can have contact with – just be thankful that he’s willing to go…
Best wishes,
BJ
Male, female doesn’t matter so much. What really matters is if your husband can find a counselor that he is comfortable opening up too. Some men might feel to embarrassed or ashamed to discuss this with a female counselor. but others might feel more pressure and fear dealing with a male. Its all about comfort level.
I would also suggest that your husband just plain ask any given counselor how much experience they have with this subject.
Finally know that ur not alone and neither is your hubby. Porn Addiction is becoming a top counseling issue of our time.
I would suggest that if he truly makes an effort and u truly want to stay with him. One, don’t treat him like a child but also don’t give him time and easy access to porn. Boredom, Instant Gratification and Stress can all feed into his addiction.
finally, and please don’t take this the wrong way…….. but you might want to try and spice things up urself with him (after he’s proven that he is taking this all seriously). what i’m trying to say is that if your husband is making the attempt u should also make the commitment to making ur relationship better physically.
I counsel on the average of 10 men a week on this issue.
I would think he would want a male counselor, but let him go with what he is comfortable with.
Be sure they have a degree