Question by x_scream22: Boyfriend occasionally taking narcotics that he has no prescription for?
I’ve been with my boyfriend for about a year now. I feel like we have a strong relationship and we have built up a lot of trust in each other. One of the positive things about our relationship is that we do not restrict each other, we’ve both been in controlling relationships in the past and it’s important to both of us that we don’t feel controlled/restricted. Well, lately things have started to become a little more serious and we’ve talked about moving in with each other. I’m excited about it but there is one thing that is worrying me. My boyfriend occasionally takes prescription drugs that he has no prescription for. Usually vicodin, sometimes xanax to get to sleep… and maybe others that I don’t really know about. I know you can become addicted to these narcotics and it bothers me when he tells me that he has taken them. I care a whole lot about him and I try to discourage him from taking them. He’s told me he is not addicted to them and he only takes them once in awhile. Should I be concerned? Is it okay for him to take them every once in awhile? Like I said, I only really try to discourage him from taking them.. I don’t tell him not to. I just want to make sure before I make the decision to move in with him that this isn’t going to be an issue. He obviously doesn’t see a problem with it so I’m afraid that if I bring it up like it is a problem he might feel like I’m trying to tell him what he can and cannot do. How should I approach this? Is it really an issue?
Best answer:
Answer by Nadia K
Addicts usually dont listen to others ..they will do it anyway both my exs were the same…support him let him know that you dont agree with what hes doing to himself and then step back…believe me he an only help himself in this situation.
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I definitely think you should sit him down and talk to him and a soft, non-judgemental tone and tell him that you are concerned about the use of schedule 2 narcotics. Tell him that you just worry about him and show that you are concerned. Tell him that you aren’t trying to tell him what to do and you certainly aren’t trying to be his mother, but that it concerns you that he’s taking something not prescribed to him. If you come to him in a loving, sweet way.. he (hopefully) won’t get defensive about it. Perhaps you can learn about how often he uses them and maybe decide that “once in a while” isn’t all that bad.
remember you are in a non controlling relationship. no offense but that was a terrible decision to do that. because in relationships some actions can hurt the other partner but since you decided you wont be controlling you pretty much have to keep it to yourself. if he does it once in a while he is not addicted. if you seem him doing it every night then you should worry.
Drug use is a fairly common thing. I don’t wanna say problem, but it can easily develop into one. Tell him you’re being concerned, which you clearly are, and ask if there is anything that is going on which would cause him to use moderately heavy drugs. Even though it doesn’t look like there’s a problem he didn’t just use these drugs once. Pills, especially downers, are an easy way for people to just get away from life for a while and it sounds like it’s on its way to a habit, even if he’s only reliant on them to sleep (which is just as bad or worse because it’ll evolve past that if there really is something underlying). Don’t show him any anger, ONLY ONLY ONLY concern. Be on the look out for signs that he’s taken them during the day or for your dates, that’s when it all gets out of hand.
Truly I wish you both the best of luck.