Question by Brennie: Should I not expect my own sister to support me in the recovery of our alcoholic parents?
Her husband is the only one drinking at family functions and my husband, son and myself are mad as hell. They’ve only been sober 3 months. My brother in law has no respect and neither does she if she supports him.
Best answer:
Answer by sky
of course not.
Give your answer to this question below!
Stop inviting them.
Plan the functions at your home, and do not
send them an invitation.
They should be more sensitive to what your
parents are going through in their recovery.
Since they feel like they do not need to show
any compassion, it is time to eliminate their
presence until they get the point.
Best wishes
It would be the right thing to do (her husband not to drink with the family) but you shouldn’t expect her to support them. Don’t supply any booze for sure.
Your parents are going to have to live in a world that has alcohol in it. I is incredibly direspectful and insensative of your brother-in law.
If I were on a life saving cardiac diet, I wouldn’t appreciate someone bringing donuts to the party.
The world will not change for an alcoholic but with a 3 month sobriety as an anchievment, it deserves the support and recognition of thier loved ones,
Your sister and her husband may defend his drinking saying he isn’t an alcoholic, they can not argue that he is an a–hole.
They can be right and they can stay home.
Wow, congrats to your parents! 3 months is a huge achievement for a recovering alcoholic. And that is seriously rude of your sister and her husband. I suggest that whoever organizes these family functions tell them that alcohol will not be tolerated, and if they show up with any they will be asked to leave. If you can persuade whoever does the functions, then that would be good, or you could ask if you could play the enforcer yourself.
I suggest giving them a congratulatory party. Just something small, with family only. Get a cake decorated for them, serve party food, that kind of thing. Invite your sister and brother-in-law and tell them that you really don’t appreciate the fact that they always flaunt their liquor around your parents, and that this is one time that it is NOT going to happen. Offer to throw them out bodily if they show up with any.
Alternatively, have you spoken to your sister about this? Perhaps she isn’t aware that she and her husband are being inconsiderate pigs. If you’ve already done that and got nowhere, you could always publicly call her out about it next time they show up with booze. Just say loudly “NICE, sis! Bring alchohol to a family function where there are recovering alcoholics! Way to show class and consideration!” Make her look like a jerk, not that she needs any help!
good luck!