Question by wonderwoman: About to pull out my hair and go insane?
I have a seven year old foster child that was a drug baby – full of heroin and meth. He has ADD and has a dose of autism. His mother never took the time to parent him because she was drugged up and now we have a seven year old that acts like a two year old. Mom was a drugee, Dad died because of drugs, and home life was a nightmare. When mom felt guilty she felt the need to baby him to the extreme – feeding him baby food at the age 6, but not teaching him anthing about being clean or respectful towards other people or their properties. This child has been in “the state system” for twelve weeks. He has power struggles with everything imagineable and has a will power that will not be dominated by someone else. He likes to control, dominate, and if he doesn’t get his way he screams and throws fits. He feels the need to always be in the center of everything. He has terrible table manners, as well as disrespect for others especially children. Spanking is not allowed and he has become desynsatized to yelling. I don’t yell but talking and reasoning with him is not working nor is time outs. I take away his toys, but he doesn’t care. The weird thing is that after seen his mom miserable and in pain for several years, he wants that for himself as well. I don’t know what else to do. He is in a special school for kids just like him, gets counseling on a daily basis and is on a medicine to control his ADD. But I am at my wits end in trying to help him out. Any advice?
Best answer:
Answer by execva
Wow. I have absolutely NO advice but just wanted to say I can totally respect your willingness to foster a child from such a difficult background. Does the agency you’re with give you any training in these kinds of special needs? It seems to me that if a child needs specialised care the agency should either have foster carers with those skills or else provide them to those willing to take on the job. Is there a case worker for him that you can speak with?
I really applaud your selflessness. This is a HUGE ask of anyone and it’s not something the majority of people could take on.
What do you think? Answer below!
Have you not been offered any advice or support on fostering a child with these problems?
I really don’t have advice either but do have the up most respect for you and your willingness to take on a child with such problems.
I would suggest seeking help or some kind of support group for autistic children? Maybe look up any techniques that can help. Sorry I’m not much help.